The RSVP deadline on your invitation must fall before catering's final headcount date

Sending invitations looks like a design and printing task, but it actually sits in the middle of a chain of dates, and if any link is miscalculated, you're the one who pays.

The chain

1. 6–8 weeks before: formal invitations go out
2. 3–4 weeks before: RSVP deadline
3. Leave at least 1 week to chase non-responders
4. 4 weeks before: catering needs the final headcount

The key is that step 2 must precede step 4, with chasing time in between. Because some people never RSVPThat's not an accident, it's the norm, usually ten to twenty percent.

The cost of getting it wrong

Most catering contracts state that once the final count is confirmed, you can add but not subtract.

So if your RSVP deadline is the day before the headcount date, you're forced to report "responses received plus a guess." Over-report and you pay for every extra meal; under-report and adding late may not be possible.

The right approach is to keep the number conservative, use the chasing time to firm it up, and add later if needed.

When to send earlier

6–8 weeks is standard for an ordinary wedding. Move to 2–3 months in these cases:

• A destination weddingAfter all, guests have to book flights, take time off, and possibly apply for visas.
• Most guests flying long-haulFor example, relatives flying over from Taiwan.

For those guests the earlier action is really the save the date (8 months out, see item 36 of the checklist); the invitation just fills in the details.

What the invitation must contain

• Date, time and location (a full address, not just the venue name)
• The RSVP deadline and method
• The dress code(dress code), because if you leave it out, you might see everything from suits to jeans.
• Accommodation and transport information (put a room block here, see item 96 of the checklist)

What doesn't go on it

Registry information. In American etiquette printing a registry on an invitation is inappropriate, as is "no gifts please" or "cash only." That information belongs on the wedding website (see items 95 and 115 of the checklist).

The bilingual question at a Chinese wedding

Both languages side by side, or two separate versions? Two versions lay out more beautifully but double the cost.

If you split them, remember the Chinese version for older relatives should carry the traditional formal phrasing and both sets of parents' namesThese are details the elders care about. The English version follows American convention by listing the dress code and RSVP URL.

Also, older relatives may not RSVP online, so keep a paper reply card or a phone option open.

The last step before printing

Have at least three people proofread: dates, addresses, and name spellings. A printing error means reprinting the whole batch, and design plus printing alone takes 4 to 6 weeks, so there is no room in the schedule for a second try.

In one line

Ask catering which date they need the final count, back off a week for the RSVP deadline, and another 3–4 weeks for sending the invitations.

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