WE LIVE IN USA
Skip the first look and you need 60–90 minutes after the ceremony: during which you aren't at your own reception
A first look is the couple seeing each other privately before the ceremony, with photos taken. Whether to do it is a decision about time, not only about romance.
The two cases
Reasons to do it
- It drastically compresses post-ceremony photographyMost of the group photos can be taken beforehand.
- You get to attend your own cocktail hour
- The emotional footage is fullerMeeting privately lets you actually look at each other, talk, and embrace, without having to put it all on display in front of hundreds of people.
Reasons not to
You lose the traditional "first look" surprise during the ceremony, the moment the bride walks in and the groom turns to see her.
That's a real value, and nobody needs to be talked out of it.
But know the cost
Without a first look, you have to allow 60–90 minutes after the ceremony for family and group photos.
And during that window the couple is entirely absent from the receptionGuests are sipping cocktails and waiting for you while you're still off somewhere else taking photos.
Build those 60–90 minutes into the run sheet (see item 39 of the checklist). The most common mistake is allowing only 30 minutes and pushing the entire evening back.
How to decide
Ask yourselves two questions:
- Which matters more to you? The first look during the ceremony, or attending your own cocktail hour
- How many group photo combinations do you have? With a large family and 15 or more groupings (very common at Chinese weddings, see item 105 of the checklist), skipping the first look puts you under serious time pressure
A middle path
You can do a partial version:
- Take each side's family photos before the ceremony (groom + his family, bride + hers)
- After the ceremony, only shoot the combinations that need both families together
That preserves the surprise of the first look while cutting the time by more than half. Particularly useful for weddings with large families.
Another kind of first look
Some people do a first look not with their partner but with their fatherOnce the bride is dressed, her father gets to see her first.
For a Chinese family this version may mean more than one with the partner, and it doesn't touch the surprise during the ceremony. Photographers are usually very happy to shoot it.
Who needs to know
Tell the photographer and the coordinatorBecause this changes the structure of the whole day's schedule: how early hair and makeup start, when vendors arrive, and when the ceremony begins are all interlocked.
In one line
Skip it and reserve 60–90 minutes in the run sheet; with a large family, you can at least take each side's own photos in advance.